centaur

While bestiality is a pretty big no-no in the real world, no one has said anything about what would happen if they were half human… Centaurs are precisely such a creature, adding fuel to the fire for lovers of MLP everywhere. They are generally depicted as having a horse’s body for their legs, and a human torso, arms, and a head. Certainly there would never be lower back issues with that setup.

If you were to take a wild swing as to where this creature hails from, you’d be right in guessing Greece. We are making the board about 90% Greek for the time being, but the fact that almost all of their monsters like to get smashed and bump uglies is just too good of a starter pack. Centaurs were born of the child of cloud fluff in the shape of Hera and a horny king who murdered people. This child, named Centaurus, ended up boning some horses and making this half-breed of people-horse…horse-people.

Of course, Zeus made other horse-babies by cumming on the Earth. Hera also got mad about something and turned some centaurs that Zues made into ox-horned centaurs. They were quite well-known for being more bestial as a race, with the great centauromachy being a big kurfuffle. The centaurs tried to carry off Lapith women after getting drunk as fuck at a wedding, and it didn’t go well for them.

There are other accounts of centaurs that had different body configurations as well as lady centaurs, and it all likely stemmed from simpleton societies who didn’t know what a horse was or that people could ride them. Of course, to get it to the completed form that we often see in old pottery and statues is a little too…robust to be a big scary monster. I’m thinking someone had some sexy thoughts about this sort of combination before you get to the exceedingly well-muscled, chiseled figures we often get to see from antiquity. If you could have any half-animal half-human lover, or multiples, which would you choose?